Yesterday's post was Thought For The Day, which was Simon Weil's quote about the importance of having roots. When I read this earlier in the week, it really struck a chord with me. Why do I feel so rootless?
For a long time now, I have felt as though something were missing. There is a sense of impermanence about many aspects of my life. I know that all of us face changes throughout our lives, but I think that what has had a huge impact on life here is the lack of a sense of belonging.
When I saw Simon's quote, I realised that being rooted is probably the least recognised human need. We all need to feel like we know where we come from; to feel part of a family and a community. Living thousands of miles from my family has been hugely challenging at times and I miss them.
The question is where do I go from here?
I know what you mean and can empathise. I have never really felt connected to any place, so my home is where my mum and Mr VP are. In some ways, this is a good thing, but in others it can feel as if you never really have a proper home, a place to 'root' forever (and where we are currently is not home to me). Impermanence can go both ways and can allow you to go places and do things that you might not otherwise do. But if you are coming back to the same questions, the same dragging feeling of wanting to be back with your family, then I think it is fate or the cosmos or something greater telling you that that is where you need to be. At least you can take some comfort in knowing that you are in a profession that is highly valued (and currently massively understaffed) over here and I'm sure you could get a job very easily (I'm not sure what your husband does, but I'm sure he would be able to find something!).
ReplyDeleteMost of all, listen to your own heart. If I'm right, you live in your dream place in Canada, but if you have achieved this long-sought goal and you still aren't happy, then listen to your gut. Good luck! I'm here with crossed-fingers and moral support :)
Best wishes,
Tash from vintagepretty.org