We are slowly settling into our new home. It is three weeks since we arrived, but there are still a few boxes to unpack. It always takes a while to juggle possessions and find a place to put them and we have found ourselves rearranging the boxes rather than actually emptying them.
It has been a challenging few weeks with all of the upheaval. Two months ago, I made some life-changing decisions and to say that I was filled with a sense of trepidation is an understatement.
I had been battling with health issues due to work-related stress and they came to a head at the end of January. It was a while before I was capable of making any kind of decisions, but I had to acknowledge that I could no longer function in a life which involved constant on-call hours and the feelings of dread every time the pager went off. I had a complete breakdown at work and had to leave.
At the time, I couldn't talk about it. To be honest, I couldn't talk to anyone about what was happening: everything felt out of my control.
Although I feel a sense of relief that I quit my job and we moved away to another place, I'm still feeling a sense of anxiety about my experiences and it is going to take quite a while to recover.
The kindness of friends who rallied round and helped us load the truck for our move still brings tears to my eyes. It was hard to say goodbye, but we needed a fresh start away from painful memories of workplace bullying which persisted for three years and culminated in a breakdown.
Holly Hobbie 'Friendship is a treat for two' was a parting gift from my dear friend Ruth.
It must have been a hard decision to make but in the end your health and well being are more important. It sounds as if your working experiences have been dreadful and no one should have to suffer under those conditions. It will take a while to feel strong again but with the help of wonderful friends both old and new you will get there. Take care, Marie:)
ReplyDeleteThank you Rosie for your kind words. A couple of people have said that health is what is important and it is true. It just didn't make the decisions any easier. I'm hoping to find the strength to move on - it will take time, but I'll get there.
ReplyDeleteMarie x
It took such courage and boldness, Marie, to leave your job and move away... At the time, I'm sure you felt far away from courage or boldness. But we start dying inside when we don't make big changes when we know we need to. (Speaks one who is on the cusp of transition and not feeling bold at all... ;) It is hard to close door, even on the difficult chapters of life. It take time to process feelings and cope with things while we try to get a gentle foot-hold on the new chapter beginning. VERY much I wish you all the very best, my friend in this new chapter you're embarking on. One that I hope will find you enjoying life, work, your new place, renewed health and so much more! ((LOVE & HUGS)) P.S. Holly Hobbie--oh, how I loved her as a girl!! :)))
ReplyDeleteDear Tracy,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind words of support and encouragement. Most of all, thank you for your friendship.
Marie x